Lessons of Parenting: Never Say Never

     While I was pregnant with Tessa, I spent time reading a few different parenting books, each with different approaches, strategies and tips for successful baby-raising. My intent was to gather a variety of information so I could pick and choose what I liked best and use that to form my own parenting style.

     This, of course, led me to start saying things like “I’ll never do this”, or “my child will never be like that”. And, if I’m really being honest, these “nevers” started long before we were expecting our own baby – I’ll admit that I would often watch other people’s children or parenting styles and make a mental note of what I would or would not do when I had my own kids (for all the parents reading this, go ahead and laugh at me now).

     Once Tessa arrived, we quickly (and I mean QUICKLY) learned that all those things we always said we would never do were now available options.

     We said we’d never let our baby sleep in our bed with us. Well, guess where she ended up on some of those first nights at home? When it’s 3 am and your baby has yet to go to sleep, you’ll do ANYTHING, trust me.

     I never wanted to formula-feed my baby. But when she started losing too much weight in her first few days of life, obviously we had to do something, so supplementing with formula became necessary for her health and safety.

     I think we all have our own ideas and desires when we enter into parenthood and that’s normal and perfectly ok. A lot of the time it works out wonderfully.  But I’ve learned in my two and a half short months as a mother to not dismiss something just because I don’t immediately like it or because I think it’s weird or something. Baby-raising is hard work; why would I limit myself to just one or two tricks or approaches when option number 3 or 4 may work best for my baby?

     I think along with this “never say never” attitude comes a whole lot more understanding for other parents as well. How do I know what they have or haven’t tried? Why am I so quick to judge without knowing the whole story? My time is much better spent being open minded and trying to learn from other parents rather than judging them!