Welcome, Violet!

Well, I most certainly did not think that my 32 week pregnancy update post would turn out to be my LAST pregnancy update post, but that's exactly what happened. Our second daughter, Violet Eve, just couldn't wait any longer and decided to make her surprise appearance about 4 1/2 weeks ahead of schedule. I never thought I'd have a preemie - Tessa was 5 days overdue and so I just expected to go over with Violet too, and was actually completely fine with going over, since we had lots of things we had hoped to have done before her arrival. But God had a different plan, and I've learned that no matter what it seems or feels like at the time, His timing is always perfect.

So, without further ado, here's the story of Violet's unexpected arrival....

32.5 weeks - my last pregnant selfie

Saturday, October 11...

We had planned on using the long weekend (Canadian Thanksgiving) to paint our basement. Cam started the taping and priming by himself in the morning, while I went out and did a few errands with Tessa. We had lunch and I put Tessa down for her afternoon nap, then got changed and headed downstairs to help with the painting. We worked until about 3:30 that afternoon (I painted for a total of about 2 hours), then we had to get cleaned up, wake Tessa, and head over to Cam's aunt & uncle's for Thanksgiving dinner.

We had just sat down to dinner when I suddenly felt a small trickle of fluid, almost like I had lost control of my bladder for a second (if you've ever been pregnant you know that that's not completely out of the question!). I got up and went to the washroom, to see if I could figure out what was going on. I wasn't totally sure at that point, and I didn't want to make a big deal of it, so I just thought "hmm, that was strange", and went back to the table and finished dinner and dessert. The trickle of fluid happened a few more times throughout dinner, but I wasn't having contractions or any other signs that this could possibly be my water breaking or the beginning of labor, although by this point I had a strong feeling that that was exactly what was happening.

We left almost as soon as dinner was over. Cam got Tessa to bed while I made a phone call to the labor and delivery unit at the hospital. I explained what was going on, and the nurse suggested that I come in to be checked. Looking back, it seems kind of silly to me that I had to call and ask what to do. It was just so different from how labor with Tessa went (with her, I had been having contractions for hours before my water broke, and when it did, it was literally a huge gush of fluid - there was no question that it was my water breaking) and it was so early that I think I was in denial. I grabbed a few things - I hadn't even packed a hospital bag yet, thinking I had at least another month to get it done! - and drove myself to the hospital, part of me still in denial that I was possibly going into labor, the other part fairly certain that we would be having a baby much, much sooner than we expected.

I got to the hospital and up to labor and delivery by about 9pm and by 10 it was confirmed that my water had broken and my doctor had admitted me and ordered that I be started on IV antibiotics for possible group B strep - I hadn't had the test done yet, it usually happens around the 36 week mark. The plan was to wait overnight to see if my body would kick into labor naturally, and if not, I'd be induced in the morning.

I laid awake most of the night, hoping and praying that contractions would start, worrying about the health and safety of our baby, and fearing that being induced so early could mean a long and difficult labor and possibly interventions I did not want. I felt guilty, that somehow this was my fault (my first thought was that it was the painting, and I regretted that I had done it), and if anything were to happen to our baby as a result, I would have carried that with me forever. I felt sad too, that my pregnancy was ending so abruptly, with no warning. I felt like I was going to be missing out on the anticipation and excitement that comes in the last few days of pregnancy leading up to the due date. I did not feel ready for this.

Terrible selfies happen when you're bored and can't sleep in the hospital...

Sunday, October 12...

I was up early after only a few hours of sleep, and still no contractions. I knew I needed rest so I'd be ready for a potentially long labor, but I also didn't want to just sit there waiting, so I asked my nurse if I could get up and walk around to see if I could bring on some contractions. They made me wait until they could check with my doctor. They finally got in touch with him around 8am and I got the go-ahead to leave the unit. I wandered the hospital hallways for the next hour with no sign of anything resembling a contraction. I was getting discouraged since I knew I was on the clock, and we were already past the 12 hour mark since my water had broken. My doctor finally showed up at around 10am to get the induction started. He checked me first and I was 1-2cm dilated, but my cervix was still extremely high, so high that he couldn't feel if baby was head down so off to ultrasound I went. The ultrasound confirmed that baby was head down, thankfully, so we started with Cervidil to try and get my cervix ready, and once again, I walked and waited and waited and walked.

My parents arrived to our house by early afternoon to be with Tessa (they live about 4 hours away) so Cam could come to the hospital to be with me. It was nice to finally have some company while I waited for things to get moving. The day was dragging on and I was really bored (so bored that I had already read through 2 entire Hollywood gossip magazines, cover to cover - not like me at all) so it was good to have someone to talk to and walk around with.

By around 3:30pm, I was starting to feel some mild cramping, and I couldn't help but watch the clock - the cramps were coming about 5 minutes apart and lasting about 30-45 seconds. I was happy that I was finally feeling something that resembled regular contractions, but I didn't allow myself to get too excited, since I was pretty sure things were going to take their sweet time.

The rest of the afternoon went by with little change. I had supper in my room, then Cam and I walked downstairs to the cafeteria, where my parents and sister had stopped by with Tessa. I hadn't seen her in almost 24 hours - probably the longest I'd ever gone without seeing her since she was born! We sat and visited for a while and as we sat there, my contractions were getting noticeably stronger. I had to stop talking and grab the edge of the table for a few, and walking back up to labor and delivery afterwards was definitely more difficult than it had been earlier. I took this as a good sign that things were progressing.

The next couple hours seemed to go by fairly quickly, with contractions coming quicker and getting stronger. I tried a few different positions, but couldn't really find anything that was comfortable, so I alternated between sitting on the bed and standing beside it. It was around 9pm when I was starting to have a hard time coping with the contractions, so I asked my nurse for some morphine. With my previous labor, I had taken one dose of morphine and found that although it didn't really help with the pain, it allowed me to relax a bit more, which allowed my body to do what it needed to do. My nurse agreed, but wanted to check my cervix again before she called the doctor for the order. I was 3cm and still quite high (remember, it was about 9pm). I was a little disappointed as I was hoping for a bigger number and I resigned myself to the fact that it was going to be a long night ahead.

My nurse came back in a few minutes with the morphine, and as soon as she hung it on my IV pole, I felt the need to lie on my left side. It didn't take long - maybe 15 minutes - before my contractions were coming one on top of the other and I remember telling Cam that I didn't think I could do it anymore.

At this point, I was still in an assessment room, where I had been since the night before. The nurse came back and told me that there was a delivery room ready for me and we should move, but the last thing I wanted to do at that point was get up and walk down the hall. I did it anyway and by the time we got to the delivery room - less than a minute - my contractions were accompanied by the overwhelming urge to push. I sat down on the edge of the bed to take a few deep breaths, but my nurse firmly told me that I needed to lie down so she could check me. I was in complete shock but also relieved when she told me I was at 8cm. Out of nowhere, 2 or 3 more nurses appeared and were getting things set up, ready for delivery. I couldn't believe it was happening so fast (and kudos to those nurses for the way they jumped into action and were on top of things so quickly and efficiently - those girls know what they're doing!). I overheard my nurse talking to another nurse, and heard them say that my doctor was about 20 minutes away and that they were going to have to call another doctor, who was already on the unit, in another delivery, over to deliver our baby, since my doctor was not going to make it.

A few minutes later the other doctor showed up, and gave me the go ahead to start pushing. It took maybe 8-10 pushes, and at 9:59pm, Violet Eve was born. She was 5lbs, 15oz, so tiny, but so beautiful and perfect. A nurse from NICU and the pediatrician did a quick check, then I got to hold her skin to skin for a few minutes before her and Cam went off to NICU.

Her arrival was such a surprise in every way - from deciding to come 4 1/2 weeks early, to how quickly she came once my labor got going. It was a whirlwind, and I spent the next two or three days in shock and disbelief over how it had all happened. It was an unexpected, but beautiful way to celebrate Thanksgiving, with the arrival of our healthy baby girl.

 

32 Weeks (and a little life update)

How far along? 32+ weeks

Size of baby: Squash, about 3.5lbs and 15-16.5 inches long.

Symptoms: Feeling pretty good these days, other than lower back and pelvic discomfort. Braxton Hicks are pretty frequent (and getting stronger) now.

Movement: Lots of hiccups lately, and it feels like they're coming from low down - my doctor confirmed this morning that baby is indeed head down (yay!!).

Cravings: Sweets, as usual. And peanut butter, which sucks, because it gives me heartburn.

Most looking forward to: Being done work, although that's still about a month away. And of course, meeting our new little one in (hopefully) less than 2 months.

I still can't believe that in about 2 months or so, we'll have two kids! I'm not sure why - probably because we've been so busy the last few months - but it's almost like I haven't fully processed that we're having another baby so soon and that we're going to be parents of two! This pregnancy went so fast and, while I feel ready to meet him or her, we still have lots to do before the big day.

It's so funny how different things have been this pregnancy. The second time around is definitely much more relaxed and laid back. We still don't even have the nursery set up or anything - the first time, we had the room pretty much ready by just past the halfway point. We had decided on Tessa's name within a week or so of finding out she was a girl, this time we didn't get around to even thinking about names until about a month ago, and finally settled on one maybe 2-3 weeks ago. My diet's been more slack - I'm having caffeine once in a while and have eaten deli meat a few times (gasp!). I haven't even thought about packing a hospital bag. Of course, life is much different now than it was during our first pregnancy, and we've been so busy with buying & selling houses, moving, and working on our basement, and of course, being parents to a busy toddler, that we honestly haven't had the time to sit down and wrap our heads around the fact that baby number 2 will be here before we know it and life is about to change drastically! I think I'll also be much more relaxed when it gets to the end too - last time, I was impatient and frustrated when my due date came and went - this time I feel like I'm much more prepared to wait and let things happen on their own, partly because we still have so much to do, but also because I'm really feeling the need to hold on to every single moment I have left with Tessa as my "baby"...she's growing up so fast, and I know things will change so much once the new baby comes, so I want to make the most of what time we have left as a family of three.

Speaking of Tessa, I just have to say that she is SO amazing!! She is at such a fun and exciting age, where she's absolutely soaking up everything around her and learning so much every day. I seriously feel like she learns at least 1 or 2 new words every day and is picking up new skills with amazing speed (kid can already put on and do up her velcro shoes by herself! I don't know, maybe that's not that great...). She loves reading stories ("'to-wy"), colouring ("co-do"), and helping mom around the house (she'll see a spot of water on the floor, grab the towel off the oven door and wipe it up without being asked, and she loves helping unload the dishwasher and sweeping) and dad out in the garage. I love her excitement and enthusiasm for all the little things...we'll be looking out the window or walking outside and she points out everything she knows and names it with such excitement. She has quite the independent streak and can be a little strong-willed at times, but for the most part she's easygoing and follows instructions well. We've had the occasional "major toddler meltdown" that everyone talks about and fears at this age, but those aren't all that common, thankfully, and I'm truly loving being a toddler mom.

I've had people tell me that having two is "way easier" than one, but I'm not sure I totally believe that. I've heard others say it's really hard, so I guess it just depends on each individual's experience. I guess there's really no way to fully prepare, since there will be so many variables and unknowns - I don't know what this new baby's personality and temperament will be like, how Tessa will react and adapt to the change, how I'll feel, how the birth and recovery go...so, in a sense, I feel like we'll be winging it a bit in the beginning. I'm not sure if there's really a whole lot I want to do differently than we did with Tessa (I think we've done an ok job, so far!), other than maybe be a bit more intentional with routine and schedule from the get-go (or as early as I can). In our experience, life is just so much easier with a predictable (but flexible) routine and I think it'll make life with two little ones more manageable. I'm also hoping it'll help with nighttime sleep, and hoping we can maybe avoid some of the issues we dealt with last time. But either way, we're so excited to meet our new precious bundle of joy and are looking forward to being a family of four!

29 weeks

How far along? 29 weeks

Size of baby: Acorn squash, about 2.5-3.5lbs.

Symptoms: Getting to the uncomfortable stage, especially when trying to sleep. Braxton Hicks have also become much more frequent. And heartburn...at least it started a lot later than my last pregnancy and so far isn't nearly as severe, more just annoying.

Movement: Oh yes - this little one does flips and somersaults all day and all night! I've had a few good jabs from feet and elbows to the point where it almost hurts a little from the inside, but I still enjoy feeling all the movement. I've been noticing some hiccups here and there too.

Cravings: Sweets, which is pretty typical for me, and probably not really a true "craving". :)

Most looking forward to: The cooler weather of fall, and maybe some shopping for some more fall-ish maternity clothes.

My husband and his dad also started working on finishing our basement this weekend, so it'll be fun getting to pick paint colors and all the finishings and putting it all together. We're hoping to have it done by the time baby gets here - hopefully we're not being too ambitious!!

A couple before pictures:

26 weeks + Vacation Recap

How far along? 26 weeks - almost third trimester!! Yikes!!

Size of baby: Head of lettuce, about 1.5-2lbs.

Symptoms: I decided to try coming off Diclectin again, so as of Sunday night I've been off of it. It's been going ok, I still get sick at least once or twice in the morning without it, but I think that's manageable, at least on days I'm off work. I still have a few doses of Zofran left that I can use in a pinch, or that I can take with me to work and take if needed since they work much faster than the Diclectin. It'll be nice to be off medication, so I'm hoping the nausea keeps improving and I can stay off for good.

Movement: Lots! The other night I was laying on the couch, and baby was doing somersaults that I could see from the outside. My belly was jumping around like crazy. The only time I don't really enjoy the movement is when it happens after I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and keeps me awake!

Cravings: Vanilla Iced Coffee...I could have one almost every day, especially when it's hot. And we were just in Ottawa last week and I bought a jar of Maple Butter which I am devouring on bread or crackers!

Maternity clothes: Finally found some maternity shorts so I can keep cool.

Most looking forward to: I'm going to answer this with what I'm NOT looking forward to this week - my glucose test! Ugh...that orange syrupy stuff is so gross!

I also wanted to share a bit about our recent trip to Ottawa. We had a great little vacation, got to spend time with family, watch Cam run his big race, and see some sights.

Waiting for Dad at the finish line - and posing too, of course.

Tessa did well on the flights - it's a whole different ball game flying with an 18-month old versus a 7-month old (which is how old she was last time she flew). She's much more independent and mobile now and is quick to let you know when she's not impressed by squealing loudly! Keeping her busy and content on a 3.5 hour flight was a challenge, but we all survived.

The only time she will EVER sleep while being held

 She did really well, too, with the 2-hour time zone difference and adjustments to her schedule. She napped well, slept well at night, ate decently, and seemed to really enjoy all the new people she met.

Visiting Great Grandpa

A relaxing afternoon at the cottage

Canadian Parliament

Daytime and nighttime in Old Montreal

It's always fun to get away and see different places, but is almost better coming back home to the familiar routines of everyday life. We're getting settled back into normal and have focused our energy on finishing up the last of the unpacking and settling into our new home. We have a couple more small weekend trips coming up in August & September, and then fall will be here!

23-ish weeks

This pregnancy is absolutely FLYING by (I think I've said that before, but it's TRUE!!). I can't believe I'm already past the halfway point and getting close to third trimester! CRAZY!

How far along? 23+ weeks

Size of baby: Somewhere between a grapefruit and a cataloupe.

Symptoms: I've been SUPER tired this week. We moved into our new house last week, so I think it's just from all the excitement and busy-ness of the packing, moving, and unpacking that's got me so wiped these days. I also had an episode last week where my heart started racing and wouldn't stop for a solid 5 minutes. It gave me a good scare, so we actually ended up going into the hospital to have things checked out. Baby was fine, and of course, they couldn't find anything wrong with me because everything had settled down by the time we got there. I just wanted to be on the safe side since I'm pregnant. The doctor also wanted me to wear a 24 hour heart monitor just in case it happens again, so today, I'm sporting this lovely contraption...

Movement: Yes - getting stronger and stronger, although I'm pretty sure this little one isn't quite as active as Tessa was, unless I'm not remembering correctly. It seems like baby loves hanging out in a little pocket lower down on my left side, that's where I'm feeling most of the movement from. As of about two weeks ago, Cam was able to feel movement from the outside and at times I'm able to see my belly move too.

Cravings: Not much of anything this week.

Maternity clothes: Oh yeah!

Most looking forward to: We're heading to Ottawa on Friday to see some of my family and for Cam to run his Spartan Beast! I'm really looking forward to getting away, having some time with family who I haven't seen in years, seeing some sights, and hopefully getting in a decent amount of relaxation too.

23.5 weeks and feelin' large.

19 week update

How Far Along? 19 weeks! How is it possible that we're already almost half way to meeting this baby?!??

Size of Baby: According to The Bump, about the size of a mango. About 6 inches long, 8.5oz.

Symptoms: Still some nausea and sickness the odd morning, but definitely improving. Round ligament pain has shown up. And headaches, oh my, the headaches (I blame them on my anti-nausea meds)!!!

Movement: Yes, although not too consistent yet. Just started feeling the first flutters the past 2 weeks or so and they're definitely getting stronger.

Cravings: I actually had my first pickle cravings ever - I never ate pickles while pregnant with Tessa, they made me sick. Not the case this time, I could eat handfuls at times. :)

Maternity Clothes: Just bought a few T-shirts, and have been going back and forth between regular pants and maternity pants. I can actually still fit into my regular jeans, probably because I'm carrying on the higher side. I'm still on the lookout for some cute dresses for summer.

Most Looking Forward To: Ultrasound tomorrow!! We get to see our little bambino for the first time! Can't wait!

A Little Avocado...

This is a little strange, signing back into my Blogger account after over 3 months away! It's been a nice little break from blogging...life has been busy with working part time and I just haven't found the time to get any writing done. I've also felt like I haven't had much to say these past few months, and didn't want to write posts just for the sake of writing posts, so that's why it's been so quiet around here.

And the biggest reason for my disappearance is that we've been busy trying to sell our house and buy a new one and all that goes along with that. We need more space since baby #2 will be making his or her appearance sometime in November!

If you follow me on Instagram you've probably already seen this picture, but I wanted to put it on the blog too, since I'll be starting some pregnancy update posts in the next few weeks...which means I need to start taking some bump pictures! I can't believe we're already past the 17 week mark...this pregnancy is FLYING by! Our ultrasound will be in a little over 2 weeks and we're so excited to see this new little one.

So far this pregnancy has been quite similar to Tessa's, except that I'm finding that some symptoms have started earlier and in some cases are much worse than the first time. I've heard that's pretty common. For me, the nausea & sickness started about 3 weeks earlier than it did with Tessa and has been much, MUCH worse. I've also started to have some slight hip and pelvic discomfort that I didn't get until later with Tessa, as well as nasal congestion that I didn't get until the last 8 weeks or so last time around. And of course, I'm bigger than I was at this stage last time. But other than that I'm feeling pretty good and am so excited to be a part of bringing another life into this world.

17 weeks - excuse the terrible picture!

Life as a Working Mom

Well, I've officially been a working mom for 6 weeks, and as you can tell by the complete lack of posting on my blog, it's been BUSY! Busy, but good. We've managed to find a new routine and it seems to be working out well. I'm so fortunate and thankful that I'm only working part-time (2 days/week), so I still get to be at home with Tessa the other three weekdays and on weekends. It's really the perfect balance for right now.

The first few weeks were definitely a challenge with trying to figure out how to get all of us out the door by 7:30am, having to leave Tessa at the dayhome crying, and trying to keep up with all the other errands and chores that still need to be done with two fewer days a week to do them.

Our morning routine is working out nicely. I get up first, around 6am, get myself completely ready to go, then get Tessa up just before 7 and get her ready. For the most part it's worked perfectly, except for the odd morning when she wakes up too early and I'm not quite ready yet. It also helps immensely to have everything laid out and ready to go the night before. This is what our hallway and kitchen counter look like the night before a work day:

Tessa had a few rough days at her dayhome in the beginning, including one day when she cried almost all day. It was the day after a rough night, so she was really tired. For her to be tired at home is one thing, but to be tired in a new, unfamiliar environment is a whole different ball game. The mom guilt hit me hard that day. I felt so bad for both her and the caregiver, and felt like I was making a huge mistake by being back at work. Thankfully, that turned out to be an isolated incident, and she's done very well since. She doesn't even cry anymore when I drop her off in the morning, which is bittersweet for me. I'm happy that she's happy there, but sad that she's growing up and becoming more independent.

Tessa got to sponge paint for the first time at the dayhome. First artwork for the fridge!

And as for keeping up around the house, well, it's going ok. I've never claimed to be the world's greatest housekeeper, so it doesn't bother me too much if things get left undone at times (for example, our kitchen & dining room floor is TERRIBLE right now - I should probably be doing that instead of writing this! Haha!). But I do know that I need to make myself some kind of schedule so I make sure the things that MUST get done are getting done. I also need to work on using my time at home as efficiently as possible and prioritizing to keep this place somewhat liveable.

Our living room often looks like a bomb went off

Tessa's room on laundry day (it doesn't stay like this!!)

Yes, life has been a little crazy these past 6 weeks as we've settled into our new normal. Life as a working mom is definitely hard, but I wouldn't say it's any harder or easier than being a full time stay at home mom (although I can't imagine how the full time working mamas do it! Hats off to you!). It's just different. They both have their own unique challenges. I came across this post on Facebook - it's written as two letters - one from a SAHM to a working mom, and vice versa. Having been on both sides, I think it perfectly sums up the challenges that each one faces. There's no need to argue over who has it harder. We're all moms, we just need to support each other at whatever place in life we're at.

Tessa's First Birthday Party

Man, being a part-time working mama sure is cramping my style (post to come...someday!). The time I used to spend working on my blog and reading other blogs is now used for catching up on the errands and chores I don't have time for on work days. I feel so out of the blogging loop...I think I only scrolled through my Bloglovin' feed once or twice this week, so I feel like I'm missing out on so much.

These first few weeks back at work aren't necessarily going to be the new normal, though, since we had not one, but TWO birthday parties for Tessa over two weekends, so that kept me extra busy. Since both of our families live out of town, we had my family here one weekend, and my husband's family the next. It didn't work for everyone to come at the same time, and we don't have the space for everyone to be here all at once, so that's why the two parties. We planned one party, and threw it twice! :)

We decided to go with a simple, small, family-only birthday party. As much as I wanted to do a bigger, themed, Pinterest-worthy party, we just didn't have the time, nor did we want to spend the money and effort on something that Tessa won't even remember. I'll save the big theme parties for when she's a few years older! Besides, a smaller, simpler party is more our style and fits better with who we are as a family.

I kept the decorations pretty simple. I made a yarn pom-pom garland in pink and yellow to hang over the dining room window, and a simple banner using her monthly photos. I also made a little banner for her highchair and my mom picked up the balloons.

The pom-pom garland was by far the most labor-intensive part of the decor, but I started early and made a few pom-poms each day in the weeks leading up to the party, so it wasn't too bad.

 

The photo banner was just a matter of printing off 5x7's of each of her monthly photos, making the month labels and gluing them to clothespins. Easy peasy!

The highchair banner was kind of an afterthought. I wanted something to go on her chair, so at the last minute I made two extra pom-poms, my husband printed off the letters to spell "one" and I cut them out and strung them together. It wasn't the prettiest, but it worked!

I also kept the food pretty simple. We had strawberry and lemon cupcakes, fruit (strawberries, grapes, and pineapple) with my favorite Skor dip, and pretzels & dill dip for something a little salty. To drink we had lemonade.

I used framed photos of Tessa (one of her newborn shots and one of her one-year ones), and the jar I filled with hospital memorabilia as table decor, and off to one side I had the laptop set to a slideshow of her first birthday and cake smash photos. (I thought I got a picture of the whole table, but I realize now that I didn't - oops!).

No, she didn't eat the whole thing! :)

And, of course, there were presents! Tessa got spoiled by her grandparents, aunts, and uncles!

Hugs for her new owl. :)

We had two great, full weekends celebrating our sweet one-year-old with the people who love her most. We are so thankful for her and for our families for making her first birthday so special.

 

A {late} Birthday Post

Dear Tessa,

I can hardly believe that your first year has come and gone. You have grown and changed and learned so much in these 365 days, it's amazing.

I remember your birth day like it was just last week - I suppose it's a day I'll never forget. I was up most of the night with contractions, wondering if you were really coming. It didn't take long before I knew for sure and we headed to the hospital during a snowstorm to meet you. You came quickly...you almost didn't want to wait for the doctor to arrive before you made your appearance.

I remember the first few days and nights at home. You didn't want to sleep at all at night - Dad and I would take turns rocking you into the wee hours of the morning until you finally relaxed and settled to sleep, right next to us - sometimes right in bed with us. Those days and nights were long and hard, but they were still precious because we had you.

I remember our early struggles with feeding. You lost too much weight because we had trouble nursing. We tried everything, eventually feeding you some formula to get you the nutrients you needed to grow. I'm so glad we persevered and got help. Even though I was exhausted and discouraged and felt like all I did was feed and pump those first few weeks, it was worth it to see you thriving now.

Tessa, you're only one year old, but already you've taught me so much and changed me in so many ways - you have no idea, and you probably never will.

I'm amazed by you every day. I love watching you grow and learn, seeing you explore and discover your world, and getting to know you better as you get older and more of your personality shows. You are joyful, sweet, funny, smart, curious, and independent.

 

I've loved each different stage and milestone you've gone through over the past year - from holding your head up, to rolling over, to sitting up, to eating your first solid food, to crawling and babbling and dancing. Each stage brings something new and exciting and it just keeps getting better. I now know why moms always say that whatever stage their baby is currently at is their favorite stage. I know we have so much fun ahead of us, but I don't want to rush you, I just want to enjoy right now with you.

 

So thanks for this amazing year you've given us. Thanks for challenging us, teaching us, and changing us. Thanks for lighting up our days and bringing so much joy into our lives. We love you so much and can't imagine our lives without you.

Love always,

Mama